This Is How You Lose Me: A How-To Guide.


Forget the curve of my smile and the reasons I smile in the first place. Don’t remember the little things like how I have to rub my feet together to fall asleep or how I make that silly face whenever I’m deep in thought. Forget the echo of my laughter and the depth in my eyes. Try not to remember the things that hurt me; the things that make me cry. Try not to remember the things that keep me up at night and the moments that I consider magical. It’s not like any of these things are THAT important to me.


Act as though you don’t really like me when we’re out in public. Don’t hold my hand, don’t call me baby and don’t stare longingly into my eyes like you did the night before. When I try to kiss you in public, act like you’re repulsed. Don’t let me. Embarrass me. Be the loving, patient, caring lover that you are behind closed doors but when our friends come around, act as if I’m ‘just a friend”. Don’t make me feel special. It will only make me like you and we don’t want that, right? Make me feel replaceable. All the attention you used to show me, start showing it to someone else. Make her feel special even when I’m around. And when I get jealous, tell me I’m overreacting.


Stop telling me how important I really am to you. Stop letting me believe that you actually care for me. Don’t waste your time telling me I’m beautiful. When I take my time to look nice, don’t acknowledge my efforts. Stop reminding me how much you really like me. I should know that by now, right? Stop loving my laugh and hating to see me upset. The love and appreciation you used to show me in the beginning of our friendship, stop showing it. Stop trusting me and stop valuing my opinion…what do I know, anyways?


Be THAT guy. The guy who can’t show emotions. The guy who would accept death before he admits that he’s falling for me. Play hard to get. Play games. Play with my emotions. Be inconsiderate. Be a jerk. Be all the things you know I don’t like. Be a completely different person from the sweet man I met that one night you stole my attention. Be cruel. Be absent. Be very and I repeat, be VERY flirtatious with that girl you know I don’t like. To make things easier, just be everything I’ve told you I hate.


Take me for granted. Take me for a fool. Take away my trust. Take away the reasons I smile. Take advantage of my sweet nature. Take advantage of my kindness. Take my heart and toss it around. I know you said you would never hurt me but take that back! You take it back now! Go back on that promise and do your best to break it. Take all the time you want! I mean, it’s not like I want to know where this thing is headed. It’s not like I’m getting older and want to some day have a commitment from you.

So you see, it’s pretty easy to lose me. But if by chance, you want to keep me, read this backwards and it’ll be the story of a man who rescued a woman who was ready to give up and ended up keeping her forever.


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