Again.

It was a Tuesday night when you called and said you wanted to see me. I hadn’t talked to you all day so the sound of your voice served as a refreshing reminder of what happiness felt like. We met at the swings. All I brought was my lipgloss and a happy heart awaiting our reunion. My friends say I’m crazy for missing you the way I did because you put me through so much crap but they don’t understand our love. They don’t understand that the ties that bind us are stronger than the fights and arguments. What we had was something words failed at describing. So as I sat on my respective swing, waiting for you to tell me that you’ve missed me too and that you too, felt that the distance was killing you. It hurt me to look into your eyes and see an all too familiar expression. Fuck! Not again! You’ve done it again! You’ve managed to make me believe that things might actually work! You tricked me into believing that things might have actually changed! I knew what was in store for me even before you spoke. It was over. Again. Again! Why do you keep doing this to me? Why do you keep building me up, only to break me down. Why can’t we just be happy like you keep promising?
Before you even opened your mouth, the tears came down. Fast and in abundance. I felt so stupid. I cried because I couldn’t believe you did this to me again and I couldn’t believe I fell for it again. You knew what I was thinking so instead of speaking the words, you walked away. It was the best things for us both.